Week Forty-Nine: Hurry Up and Wait

We're packing to move.

It's exciting. It's chaos. It's a lot of stress.

Some people come to help. Others promise to help but don't show. Contractors come when they please, and do what they want, and leave when they want. When that happens, deadlines aren't met, schedules are disheveled, and tempers run short. 

Lost my temper with my family twice and confronted the contractor once. As a result, he is now relegated to outside work while we find another painter. 

I won't go into details, but it was a stressful weekend. The realtor wanted buyers to look at our house today, but the house isn't nearly ready. Time is ticking. 

Most of the house is packed and moved into storage until the house sells. So now we clean, pack up the minor things and wait for the new painters.

Image by Pexels from Pixabay 

I decided that I'm taking today off to write, read, and pray. 

Everything else I do to let off steam is packed. My sewing, my fiction novels, even the TV is disconnected so they can paint the walls. So no binge-watching Bones for a few days, at least.

I packed for two weeks straight, and I'm tired. One benefit, though- my husband hugged me yesterday and said I felt like I'd lost weight. He hugs me a lot, so that's saying something. Maybe this move will leave me a lot thinner and more active than I realized!

Most of the week went well. However, I blew off Friday. It was my down day, and I ate like it was an up day. It was stress eating, and I knew it- But I was so stressed, I just didn't care.

The good thing about being overwhelmed is that you don't have time to snack much, despite eating an additional meal. 

I found that my wide-open weekend window didn't work when I needed to be energetic. (Wow- that's a lot of alliteration!) 

Saturday, we had breakfast early, lunch, and dinner a little later than my usual window. So, I was tired and sluggish all day. On Sunday, I postponed my breakfast until 11am, skipped the early morning family breakfast, and had a light lunch and an early light dinner. That worked much better. I got a lot more done and wasn't as tired.

Moving is stressful, chaotic, and messy in every manner. So I'm taking today to recenter myself with God and give myself a creative break. Maybe talk with some friends, rant, and laugh. Read a little. Take a nap. Recharge my physical and spiritual batteries for the coming days.

Because when we get to our new home, it's going to be awesome.

Week Forty-Eight: Scale Away, Scale Away, Scale Away

Today is weigh-in week. Well, it was weigh-in week. My van died completely, so I'm now without the means to get to my husbands' workplace to weigh in. It doesn't matter anyway, because two weeks ago, God decided it was time for us to move, and we found our dream home and business all in one shot. We should be out of this house before next month.

No more scales!

Image by xibarodays from Pixabay 

It's all measurements from here from now on.

Since it's just measurements, I've decided that I'll color code the losses versus the gains for easier comparison. So let's take a look, shall we?

Original numbers:        4 weeks ago:            Now:              Difference:

Weight 363 lbs.                326                        ?                        ?

Biceps- 23"                       20"                   20-1/2"                 +1/2"

Chest- 61-1/2"                  60"                   57-1/2"                 -2-1/2"

Waist- 58"                      55-1/4"                55-3/4"                +1/2"

Hips- 69-1/2"                 62-3/4"                    62"                   -3/4"

Thigh- 32"                     30-1/2"                    28"                   -2-1/2"

Neck- 18"                      17-1/2"                 17-1/2"                 same

Every part of me changed, but mostly for the better. Look at those losses versus the gains! I thought I'd gained, but it looks like I lost some weight after all!

I behaved myself for the most part, though yesterday I seriously disappointed myself by eating too much on my down day. I'd made a really awesome homemade Italian chicken lasagna bake with mini noodles that looked like those canned pasta 'roller coaster' shapes, with my own homemade sauce (or gravy, for you Italian folks out there), marinated chicken breast, loaded with seasoned ricotta and topped with four kinds of cheese.

Can you blame me for taking two helpings?

I could forgive myself for indulging, but not for overindulging. Halfway through the second bowl, I was more than satisfied, but instead of wrapping it up and putting it away, I ate it. As a result, I still feel bloated this morning. Ugh.

I still don't know why I finished it off. I'd made plenty, and today is my up day so I can have more for dinner! So why do I do these things to myself?

Beating myself up about it does no good, so I'll do better today. That promise I can keep.

I've been eating more junk than usual because I'm stressed. Some of it is good stress, and some of it is not-so-good stress. We found a house in the mountains with a store attached (it was closed five years ago), and it's perfect for us to start a business while living out of the city. God's been moving so fast that my head is spinning. Two weeks ago, we were moving along a steady track, now we're on a roller coaster.

We don't get that house until we sell this one. Our realtor told us he has a line waiting for us to see our house, so we need to get packed and finish the repairs ASAP.

Two weeks minimum to pack. A month at most. I don't think I'll have a problem finding ways to be mobile this month! Our house is three stories tall and thin. That's a lot of steps.

The new place is smaller than our current residence, but the kitchen is bigger and open. I want to establish better eating habits in the new kitchen. Maybe I'm weird for wanting that, but I figure if I get used to eating at a table and not some screen, I'll be a happier, healthier person.

I'm not packing my laptop, so I'll be able to blog in the next few weeks. I just hope I'll be cognizant enough to make a post you can actually read.

In the meantime, I'll be packing and moving boxes. Who needs a gym?

Week Forty-Seven: Opportunity Knocks

Life can be pleasantly surprising!

You're humming along, getting the house in order, doing your routines, and God comes along and swats you upside the head with His blessing stick.

When God knocks, you better answer the door!

Image by Dennis Larsen from Pixabay 

Unfortunately, I can't tell you what that blessing is yet because it's a potential blessing. But if it comes to fruition, it's going to be awesome. 

This week was a blur. I wish I could tell you that I did everything I promised myself last week, but I can barely remember. All I know is I don't feel like a bloated whale, so I did something right!

Yesterday I was supposed to have three meals, but I got so involved, I forgot to eat before my window closed. Oops. Today is a down day, so I hope I didn't throw my metabolism off too much. 

As for exercise, I did many things in the house, but not all of them required me to be active. 

However, if everything works out, I'll be as active as a nest of ants. I hope I can keep up.

My brain will definitely be on overload. There's so much to think about, no less do! 

Even without this potential blessing popping up, it was an eventful week.

It started with getting my van inspected. We knew it was on its last legs, but I was stressing a little when it didn't pass inspection the first time. So we fixed what needed to be done to pass inspection, knowing this was probably the last year we'd drive it.

Two days later, It blew a gasket. Literally. The van was dead for good this time, and though this was something I'd typically be freaking out about, I was calm as a cucumber and wasn't even worried about it. No stress eating, no desire to overeat to calm the nerves. God is so good!

I'd stopped working at my driving job months ago, and I'm so glad I did. that job killed my van, but when I was home full-time, I hardly ever used it. So not having a second vehicle is a minor inconvenience now, not a major, life-altering binge-eating catastrophe it might have been almost a year ago. 

Intermittent Fasting really helped me take control of my life in so many fantastic ways.

This weekend, we went out into Lancaster to visit the farms and get fresh produce. I hadn't had much to eat because we were going to try an Amish restaurant for the first time. The parking lot was almost at capacity, which is usually a good sign that a place has good food. After a seventy-minute wait, we were looking forward to some homemade Amish cooking.

What a disappointment. The restaurant took so many shortcuts, we couldn't even finish our dinner. For us to not finish a meal is really saying something about the food. The fries were frozen, and the sauces and gravies came from a can. The mac and cheese pasta was swimming in a pool of pure cheese Whiz. Ugh.

Despite these letdowns, we had a really great time taking the family out for the day. It feels good to get out of the city and into fresh country air.

The goals this week are simple. Be mobile and pre-prep meals. I didn't cook much last week, and the leftovers are no more. I might even make a few extra meals for the freezer, so we have something to eat if I don't have time to cook in the coming weeks.

I promise I'll tell you whether the blessing happens or not. Next week is weigh-in week, and we should know something by then. As for my IF journey, I'm confident I'll see smaller numbers on the scale and on the measuring tape. 

This is going to be one exciting week!

Week Forty-Six: Small Successes

Little triumphs can feel more remarkable than the big ones.

This week was a series of minor successes- Woohoo!

Image by Gerd Altmann from Pixabay 

My down days stayed down days. My up days had healthier choices. I overate once. And even as I was overeating, I could see where and when I should have stopped. Instead, I just ate everything because I felt the need to finish the plate. 

Learning to not eat everything given you has to be the most challenging hurdle yet. My daughter was kind enough to make me dinner, and she filled my plate to the brim. I need to teach the kids to stop doing that for me- and themselves. I don't eat like that anymore. No one needs that much food!

Even my husband was surprised I finished off my plate. But he wasn't the only one. Eesh.

Yesterday we decided to gather over the fire pit to cook our own sausages, and I had a few monster shrimp waiting in the freezer for just such an occasion. It took forever for the food to cook on our campfire forks, but the conversations were laughter-filled, and there was no chance of overeating. So instead, I savored the flavor of fire-kissed shrimp and enjoyed a pepper and onion sausage with cheese on a homemade sausage roll (like a hot dog bun but bigger). 

It's nice to slow down and enjoy food and company. I don't know why we don't do this more often.

I feel so much better this past week! I feel thinner, my energy is up, and I've been more active. It's also great to see the house getting neater as I become more mobile. 

Down days are becoming my favorite days unless something particularly yummy is brought in that I have to delay eating. Though it does help me plan my up days better! Planning menus on my up days are also improving, and there's a lot less food waste in the fridge. I think I'm finally getting the hang of this lifestyle!

Week Forty-Five: Ups and Downs

Reading is a good thing. So I made time this week to make some changes, making sure to schedule in time to reread parts of my IFF book. I'm happy I did!

My down days had slowly become more 'up' than down in recent months. The reason the scale hasn't been going down is no mystery- my intake has been exceeding my energy expenditure, and the numbers show it on both the scale and my measuring tape. 

Often I was eating more on my down day within that one to two hour period than I was eating on some of my lighter 'up' days! So instead of eating less or more like I was supposed to, I rode a kiddie coaster, where all the ups and downs were little ones. I need to be more on a ride like this:

Image by Norbert Waldhausen from Pixabay 

My down days need to stay way down, and my up days need to be up, though, on weekends, I should feed the machine just to keep my metabolism off balance since I have three down days during the week.

I had to recognize my hunger levels again. When I did this in the past few weeks, I'd noticed I was getting hungrier. The pangs were extreme, just like the beginning of my IF journey. The only way it would go away is if I drowned it with a lot of water and found something better to do than think about my next meal.

Chores are a big part of increasing my mobility. Laundry used to be done sitting on the bed, and now I only sit when I fold the smaller items. Pants get folded while standing now, and shirts are either folded or hung while standing. When I need to sit, I fold the small stuff. I only fold twice a week, but it's a start!

I'd be cleaning a lot more if the kids weren't still living here. It's too easy to let them do it! My son is working his way towards independence, and my daughter will be going back to college in a few weeks, so the chore list will get busier after she goes back to her dorm. I cook two to three times a week, and I usually prep my meat and veggies sitting down. That will change shortly. As for dishes, you can never do those sitting down!

I recommended the FFR book to at least three people this week. My husband thinks I should get business cards made for sharing my blog with the world! Scary thought. But it's a really cool idea at the same time. Maybe turn my journey in video form as well? Hmm. It's worth thinking about.

The heatwaves have ebbed for a while, and I was invited to a pool this week. I love swimming! Not only is it getting me outdoors, but I love being in the water. It's constant exercise keeping above water (though fat floats ever so nicely), and by the end of the day, I'm hoping to be happily exhausted. Good energy burner!

I'm looking forward to the next few weeks. They'll be busy, but a good kind of busy. There's still a lot of heavy lifting to do in some rooms, and I hope to get the kids to do most of it before my daughter goes back to college. 

This week the focus is on getting more mobile and watching those down days! May God bless you on your journey towards a better, happier life!

Week Forty-Four: No Strings Attached Weigh-in

It's weigh-in week!

It's time to tell you about that little surprise I bought myself- I got a bonified tape measure!

Image by Mahesh Patel from Pixabay 

Now I know that doesn't seem that exciting, but when you've measured yourself with a string and a ruler, this thing is fantastic. It's soft like a tailors' tape, but it retracts like a toolbox tape measure! It took me half the time to measure myself as it usually does, and I don't have to worry about how accurate the measurements are because my string is a bit more stretchy- especially since it's forty-four weeks old!

I switched to smaller bowls and ate less this past week, and I feel so much better (and thinner) than in previous weeks. I'm also starting to see that salt is affecting me more. Though my blood pressure is still low/normal, I tend to bloat more when I have really salty foods. My feet make excellent bloat detectors. When they're fluffy, so is the rest of me.

Let's take a look at those numbers!

Original numbers:        4 weeks ago:            Now:              Difference:

Weight 363 lbs.                328                      326                      -2

Biceps- 23"                    19-3/4"                   20"                   +1/4"

Chest- 61-1/2"               58-3/4"                   60"                   +1-1/4"

Waist- 58"                      57-1/2"                 55-1/4"               -2-1/4"

Hips- 69-1/2"                 62-1/2"                 62-3/4"                +1/4"

Thigh- 32"                     30-1/4"                 30-1/2"                +1/4"

Neck- 18"                      17-1/2"                 17-1/2"                 same

That's interesting. I gained in almost every category but had one slight loss in weight. But look at the loss in my waist! 

The one thing I wanted to do but didn't was to reread my FFR book. Although I got a few walks in this week, walking further each time, which does a body good. 

It just shows that many minor accomplishments can significantly impact you more than those huge ones that don't happen as often. Yes, it was only two pounds, but it's still a step in the right direction!

This weeks' goals are simple. Reread the FFR book. No seconds. Smaller plates and bowls. Less salty foods. Walk more. Move around the house more. 

I'm one pound away from breaking my next plateau!

Week Forty-Three: Making Adjustments

It's time.

Next week is my weigh-in, but I feel I need to make some additional changes. Not drastic ones, mind you, but changes in my food choices and quantities.

Image by John Hain from Pixabay 

It's hard being home. You want to eat when others do. You want to eat earlier because someone else ate breakfast at the crack of dark, and you can still smell the wonderfulness three hours later. 

Staying upstairs still works, but I can't hide up here until my eating window opens in the afternoon. I have things to do!

I need to get tougher on myself. 

I need to reread the FFR book.

I need to find better ways to distract myself from eating too soon.

To identify the problem areas, let's go over my windows.

Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays are my down days. One meal a day. I was trying not to eat until at least 3:30, but I found that really difficult since staying home, so I moved it to 2:00 instead.

The downside to this is I eat by myself, and it's usually a pretty big meal. I'm still a little paranoid about not getting enough nutrition, even though I know I get plenty. I didn't get this big and still remain healthy by eating junk all day...right?

The upside is the next day, I feel great! I feel thin, vital, and more positive. 

Tuesdays and Thursdays are my up days. Of course, they aren't as up as my weekends, but I have two meals a day as well as a snack. Sometimes more than one snack. I usually have one big meal and one smaller one, and I try to start about 1:00, but find myself starting closer to noon instead- sometimes earlier.

The downside to this is I often eat much bigger portions in the first meal, then give myself almost no break before I eat the snack. By the time the second meal is ready, I almost don't want it, but I eat it anyway because my family is home, or I should eat it because I don't want to tank my metabolism, and sometimes simply because I can eat it since I allowed myself two meals. 

I try to keep the weekday up day window within a four to five-hour period, and sometimes it's less than that because I want my fast to be longer during the next down day.

The upside is I usually save the foods I want to eat for this bigger window.

On weekends I open the windows wide. I try to keep it under eight hours, but that's not always possible because my family likes a nice, big breakfast, at least on one of those days. So as long as I hit the eight or less window at least once, I'm okay. I still try not to eat after 7:00pm, but on occasion, I break that rule if we're doing something special.

I've been breaking more rules than I've wanted to for the past few months. I know it, and my body knows it. You've known it too since I promised to tell all in this blog.

That 'one serving' of rich and creamy soup is in a bowl that carries almost two servings, and sometimes I get another half of a bowl. So I've changed the bowl sizes back to the larger size. It's partly because it's delicious (we make awesome homemade soups here!) and because I'm still a bit afraid the leftovers will be gone by the time my window reopens. 

I've had seconds. I've even looked for extra to eat because I still had time in my window. 

The adjustments are going the wrong way! Food is starting to become a major part of my life again. Is it because I'm home most of the time now? Possibly.

I'm not blaming my home life. I'm not blaming the world, my family, or God. This is all me, baby, and I need to make some serious adjustments in the opposite direction. I need to be able to control myself in my own house, for goodness sake!

I can't even blame the weather. We've had a heatwave for weeks now, so I haven't been going outside like I'd intended. Why? Because I hate to sweat. I hate getting sticky, itchy, and stinky. I'm also lazy because I don't want to jump in the shower again. 

You'd think it would be easy to break down barriers you've put up in the first place!

Do you hear the common issues in this blog post? Fear and Laziness. Two of the Big Seven Sins of the bible. These lie at the core root of my weaknesses. I have to break away from these if I want to move forward. 

Like me, I'm sure you have your own set out of the Seven to fight.

We need to help each other to fight them together. Doing this on your own might work. Doing it with others will work. At least with others that support you and love what you're doing. I admit I need help; a lot of help. This blog is one way to discover my weaknesses and be accountable. To be honest, I never plan my blog posts. I don't write them ahead of time. I write them in the moment. 

I'm amazed at what I discover about myself when I write off the cuff!

Next week is weigh-in day. I don't expect much, though I hope the scale numbers will go down this time. I'll reread the book, go back to smaller bowls, and remember that hunger pangs mean I'm headed in the right direction. This is a lifetime change; each adjustment gets me closer to a better me. 

And isn't that the ultimate goal?