Week Thirty-Five: Reset, Restart, Relief

Wow- two weekends in a row of wide-open eating windows. It's so easy to slip back into old habits. 

But now it's also easy to get back into new habits!

We went to get my daughter from college this weekend. The college, during the pandemic, asked local families to host students that were out of state because they didn't want to keep the cafeterias open for extended periods, and some of the students wouldn't get meals during the shortened hours because of classes and finals (don't get me started on this subject...Ugh!)

My daughter was one of those students because we live about eight hours away. The host family is also where she met her new boyfriend, but that's another story. A good one, but we're talking food here.

The family is awesome and invited us to stay for an extended weekend because we had to arrive on Thursday to get her things at her dorm at the crack of dawn on Friday. Hotels are expensive, so we gladly accepted their offer- but only if they'd let us cook for them. The deal was struck, and off we went Thursday morning, looking forward to meeting the surrogate family (and boyfriend) that took care of our daughter.

I adjusted my eating windows because Thursdays are usually my up days. I ate a bit more on Wednesday and fasted on Thursday instead, having only one meal after arriving at the dorm to get our daughter and her boyfriend. We took the kids out to dinner to get to know him before going to his house. We settled in quite well with the family and went to bed.

The next three days were big homemade breakfasts, lunches dining out, and homemade dinners that we provided. Over the weekend, we prepared crockpot brisket, fresh spaghetti with homemade tomato and alfredo sauces (finding out they were awesome when mixed together), and grilled marinated chicken. We also made homemade cake with berry sauce and banana graham cracker pudding for dessert. 

My husband did most of the cooking while the host mom and I prepped. 

The family was astounded. We made enough to last them a few days after we left.

I ate at every meal and enjoyed every bite of it. I really missed all those family breakfasts!

I noticed a few changes, though. My injured leg hurt more. I was bloating again because I wasn't walking much, and the energy I'd had was waning fast. By the time we drove home, I felt like a slug. Maybe it was the long drive; maybe it wasn't. But I felt almost like my old, lazy self, which alarmed me.

I did not want to go back to living like that!

Having my daughter home is a blessing and a challenge because she's encouraging me to eat with her and has no problem eating when she wants. I see so much of my old self in her it's scary! 

She's gained weight, and I'm trying to show her what I'm doing, but I don't think I'm getting through. On the way home, she kept asking us when we were stopping to eat, or if we wanted a snack, etc.-all the things I used to do for such a long trip. 

I found myself surprised that I didn't want anything and even more surprised at how often she asked about eating.

Yesterday was my down fasting day. I ate a bit earlier than usual and more than usual because I took my daughter out shopping, and we made soup for dinner, so I had a small bowl of that, but nothing else. It wasn't a great down day, but I felt like I was getting back on track once more.

Image by Free-Photos from Pixabay 

This morning, I feel so much better! My energy is up a bit, and even though this is an up day, I want to keep the portions smaller. Maybe two small meals and a snack today. Eating too much in one meal is definitely not worth it!

I have one week to get my metabolism in high gear. Next week is weigh-in time!

Week Thirty-Four- The Slippery Slope

 Have you ever found yourself wondering if you ever beat your old habits, then opportunity gives you a chance to test your fears?

That's exactly what happened this week.

I've been home for a week since I stopped working. 

I twisted my knee, then popped or tore a tendon in the back of my knee, so it was difficult to walk.

When resting it, I had to stay on the couch with it elevated and stay in bed longer than I wanted.

And then the weekend happened. But let me go back a bit here.

I used to spend my days staying at home, not getting much done and parking my carcass on the couch for much of the day, watching videos and eating. I didn't move much and didn't want to move much. And now, here I am, back on the couch, looking at the clock and wondering how long I will last before I break my fast, and if I stepped off the ledge and am now going down that slippery slope smack into all of my old bad habits.

Sound familiar?

Image by OpenIcons from Pixabay

There were two big exceptions. I wasn't eating until my window opened, and I actually wanted to get off the couch. Small but powerful changes. I felt that I could handle the changes as long as I wasn't stuck in a chair all day.

And then the weekend happened. My husband and I went on a trip to help his mens' group do some work on a farm where their mens' event would happen in a few weeks. It was all outside landscaping prep work, and for the first time ever, I'd volunteered to help. I almost didn't go, but the guys convinced me that there would be something for me to do once we got there.

There wasn't. I also had to open my eating window wide because their breakfast was early, and their dinner was late. I felt I could throw caution to the wind for one or two days because I thought I could do something active. But my leg hurt, and I couldn't walk much at all, so I had to stay in one spot and put my leg up-or at least not move it much.

Because I also have an analytical mind, I planned for this. I brought books (since there was no internet), and brought a really comfy camping chair and a water bottle, and sat out in the sunshine, gently flexing my leg as I read and chatted with passers-by. It was peaceful.

The only true slide happened at mealtimes. The food was excellent, and I had seconds on more than one occasion. I never ate until I was stuffed, but I did eat a lot more than I normally do. On the trip home, I wondered just how far of a slip I'd made and if I messed myself up for the month.

Three days of eating isn't going to destroy thirty-four weeks of work, I had to tell myself. I still need to rest my leg, but I'm more mobile than I was before, so as long as I don't go pole-vaulting anytime soon, I can work at a slow pace and rest when I need to. 

And I still want to do things. That's important too.

As for the eating, The first few days are going to be hard since my body really liked an open window and those yummy seconds, so I just had to make sure to stay upstairs until my husband came home and drink lots of water. Keeping busy won't be an issue since I have to unpack and still do my daily and extra decluttering chores, like unpacking boxes of books and putting them on my new bookshelves.

I'll never be bored.

No guilt. I enjoyed the food and the company. I even got some sun on my face. I haven't sat and read a book in so long, I forgot how much I missed it. All work and no play make Beth a not-so-happy camper.

Today is a good day because it's fresh and new, and I can get right back into my good habits without feeling angst about the weekend. Now that I'm home, I can also plan better menus for the week when I need to sit down. 

It's going to be an awesome week!

Week Thirty-Three: I've Had Enough!

Hier und jetzt endet leider meine Reise auf Pixabay aber from Pixabay 

Have you ever gotten so frustrated with something that you quit, knowing you'd never go back again?

Me too. 

I'd had enough with a few things this week, one of them being my job.

Wait- did you think I was quitting Intermittent Fasting? I'd had enough there too, but in IFing, that's a good thing. Actually, both were good things- just one was really frustrating. Let me explain.

My job got to the point that I not only wanted to quit, I needed to quit. My van is on its last legs...er...tires, and our mechanic said that the less driving we did, the better off we'd be. After crunching some numbers, we realized it was actually starting to cost us for me to do this job.

So I called my boss and gently gave notice. Not the typical two weeks, because I knew that would be tough for them, but enough time so that they could find another driver. I figured a month, maybe a little more. 

My boss didn't have the best bedside manner and let me know there would be no replacement driver. He was ready to let me go then and there. I was shocked and more than a bit hurt by his callous attitude but said I would finish out the week. I had to let my stores and customers know I'd no longer be there. I won't say what the company that hired us would do for deliveries, but I knew it would be chaos, and I wanted my stores to be prepared.

Even though I was prepared to quit, the abruptness of it had me reeling. When something like this happens, I get stressed, and my usual go-to behavior is eating. But I'd had enough there too.

I didn't want to eat. I wanted to plan. I wanted to make my home life, my IFing life, my professional life better. The more I settled into the idea I would finally be home full-time again, the more excited I became.

The hardest part would be the exercise. I needed to be more mobile, and even the job when I was walking wasn't going to be enough in a few weeks. But I don't walk just to walk either- I needed to figure out what to do to be on my feet and moving.

Have you seen my house? All I had to do was look around to see I had plenty of reason to be on my feet and moving! From repotting plants for my shelf garden to a full-blown reorganization of the chaos that is my living and dining rooms, I had lots of things to do.

So I got to do what I love to do but haven't done in ages. Make lists.

Lists of active and inactive things I can do to make life better for my family. I need both because I still can't stand for more than thirty to forty minutes, so like my IF journey, I need to have up-time and down-time during the day to keep going all day long. 

Lists for new recipes I want to try. Lists of chores I can do so my husband can come home to a cleaner, more sane household. And lists of things I can do outside of the house, so I get some sunshine, exercise (like walking around warehouse stores while shopping- no motorized carts!), and don't feel housebound.

No TV and no eating until at least 3 pm. That's what I did when I had my job. Now my job is in the house most of the time, and the temptation to eat will be stronger. I can resist by staying upstairs and writing, sewing, decluttering, or cleaning. There's always plenty to do in a house this big- and full of people.

In two weeks, there will be more people living here. We're getting my daughter from college in New Hampshire. I definitely won't have time to be bored!

I never realized just how much I missed being a homemaker. Even though I worked a few hours a day, it was right in the middle of the day, so it was more challenging for me to get in the zone. Now I can zone all I want without restrictions! God had blessed me with the time, and I intend on using it to its fullest.

Eating this week was so much better than the past month. Opening my window wider during the weekends definitely helped. This morning I woke up refreshed (though the Benadryl helped), and when I stood up, I had that 'skinny' feeling again. I had two meals on Saturday and three smaller ones on Sunday, so I expected to feel bloated. Nope. Apparently, I had enough! 

Today is my down day (one meal), and I already have a full schedule. I feel terrific- not just physically, but I feel like I could take on the world and win. 

This is where the tires meet the pavement, folks. Can I resist temptations and not revert back to my couch potato days? Will I resist becoming a TV and junk food junkie? Will I become a more active, happier person?

Stay tuned for the next episode of IFing For Life! 

Week Thirty-Two: Don't Let The Numbers Fool You Weigh-in

Image by FotoZeit from Pixabay 

Surprise, surprise! I have pictures!

It's been an interesting week, and I really thought I sabotaged myself. Maybe I did, but not as badly as I thought. Sometimes I get what I like to call that 'Skinny Feeling'; it's a happy, sexy feeling I get when I have energy, and my fanny pack hangs at just the right spot, so it seems as if I have a flat belly, tiny waist, and hips that sway better than any hula dancer.

That didn't happen as much this week. I felt big and bloated. Not quite like a beached whale- more like a waddling walrus. The hippo hungries weren't nearly as needful as they were last week, though I found myself grazing more than I liked.

My indoor garden was ready to harvest this week, and I'd made myself some wonderful Zuppa Toscana soup, using all of the kale and spinach I grew. It was so good! I enjoyed it this entire week.

I wish I could say I grazed on the ton of romaine lettuce I grew. Chips, nuts, and some Swedish fish were what I grazed on instead, except for one day where I remembered I had all that lettuce. I still have some left, but I also have the other stuff left too. That's also a good thing because that means I didn't eat it all within a few days. It's been at least a week and a half, and all that stuff is still here!

When I get off track, I always go back to the book Fast, Feast, Repeat. I have a bookmark where Gin Stevens talks about the up and down days and how to adjust them. Why? Because that's where I tend to mess up.

I don't get the diet mentality as much as before, but it still hits me occasionally. I close the eating windows too tight, restrict too much on up days, and WHAM, my body gets sluggish and plateaus. 

And that's exactly what I did. I'm currently doing a 4:3 up and down days, with my hours being 19:5 on weekends, 20:4 to 23:1 during the week- one meal on my down days, two on my up days. I should be doing 18:6 on my up days with two meals and maybe a small snack. And all I drink during my fast is water.

My measurements didn't change much this month, but the scale did! I lost six more pounds!

Here are the numbers:

Original numbers:        4 weeks ago:            Now:              Difference:

Weight 363 lbs.                332                      326                      6

Biceps- 23"                   19-3/4"                    20"                  +1/4"

Chest- 61-1/2"              59-1/2"                    59"                   -1/2"

Waist- 58"                     54-1/2"                 56-1/4"              +1-3/4"

Hips- 69-1/2"                   62"                    62-1/2"               +1/2"

Thigh- 32"                       29"                     28-3/4"                -1/4"

Neck- 18"                     17-1/2"                 17-3/4"                +1/4"

And the pictures!

When I started:

Now:

I decided to hold my arms out from now on so you can see the changes in my bat wings. The shirt feels loose and comfortable now, and the shorts are very loose, though not falling off my hips. 

I lost a bit more roundness in the booty than I'd wanted, but exercising my glutes can adjust the curves. But look how much the sleeves hang down now! My arms look much slimmer.

Now I have a story to share. I weigh 326. I lost 37 pounds. Nearly a decade ago, I maxed out at 325. It was the heaviest I'd ever weighed at the time, and that weight healed steady for several years. I never thought the scale would tip so far forward that my first main goal would actually be my 'heaviest ever' weight. 

One pound shy of that first goal- isn't that crazy?

I have several mini-goals. 325, 300, 278, 265, 225, 200, 180, and 160. All of these during my lifespan, each was my 'heaviest' weight at the time. 

300 was my weight when both kids were born.

278 was the baby weight lost after the first child. I never lost it after the second.

265 was my marriage weight.

225 was my heaviest ever in my twenties.

200 was when I considered myself fat.

180 was when I lost twenty pounds and was feeling skinny.

160 is my ideal goal weight, though I'm cool if my body wants to go lighter.

Yes, that's a lot of numbers. Each represents a hurdle I need to jump and a mindset that needs to be conquered. I can honestly say no diet has ever given me the hope that this IF book has. 

I still have to wrap my brain around the fact that I need to eat more to lose weight! I hope my journey inspires you as well. I'm not holding anything back, good or bad, or trying to polish a turd so the crappy parts look shiny. It's a life-long trek into a thinner, happier, more active life.

I've come a long way already. No more contemplating wheelchairs for me! I'm planning on walking on the beaches in Cape Cod next year!